- April Fools! This story is not real.
Mexit supporting staff narrowly carried the day with a vote of 53.4% compared to 46.6% of colleagues who preferred to remain aligned with Martin.
However, only 72.2% of the JDW’s workforce decided to take part in the vote, which could leave room for Martin supporters to call for a second referendum in a bid to overturn the vote.
However, this possibility was greeted with fury by those who were hoping to “take back control” of the company from its founder. “Mexit means Mexit,” said one while enjoying a pint of reasonably priced Abbot Ale while tucking into a surprisingly good-value curry. “The people of ’Spoons have spoken and we demand our freedom.”
Mexit means Mexit
Remain supporters expressed frustration at the way the campaign had been carried out, with JDW pubs flooded with propaganda claiming a wide range of false benefits once the organisation claimed back its “sovereignty” from Martin, ranging from the restoration of Jägerbombs through to a new magazine that customers would actually want to read.
“Martin?” cried one. “What’s he ever done for us? Well, apart from founding the business, and building up a huge chain of highly successful pubs throughout the UK. Apart from that, what’s he ever done for us!?”