Pete Robinson: Beer prices will more than DOUBLE!

My warning has always been that the smoking ban isn't the end of the matter. It was the beginning. The vicious onset of a war on pubs.

A war that stepped up a gear last week with the ominous inauguration of the Health Alliance which threatens to be the pub's most powerful enemy yet witnessed.

Of course there's been a 'health alliance' for donkey's years. ASH, the WHO, CRUK, Alcohol Concern, along with factions of the DoH and NHS, have always been in cahoots because they share a common bond.

They are all made up of antis - misguided, illiberal sociopaths with a pathological aversion to individuals having fun in any form. Coupled with an utter contempt for the majority view.

But the 'new' Health Alliance consists of the most dangerous antis, those with letters after their name. Well paid career-antis with over-inflated egos. Antis who take themselves so seriously they believe they have a God-given right to control the liberties and social habits of us lesser mortals.

Like the Borg all antis have but one aim - to assimilate us all into their utopian, healthy, and arse-wipingly boring way of life.

Pubs can play no part in that agenda. They must be removed because they are mere assembly rooms for unhealthy living, unhealthy thinking and dangerous dissent. Keep the proles at home where they can only meet in tiny numbers. It's the classic 'divide and conquer' strategy.

And I use the words "agenda" and "strategy" quite deliberately because you can rest assured these clever people have plans for us that they aren't prepared to share at this stage. They've adopted the Nu-Labour philosophy of lies, spin, and paranoiac guarded secrecy. Don't let 'em know what's in store until it's about to be passed and there's bugger-all they can do about it.

But there's one consistent flaw in the veneer that holds these neo-puritanical prohibitionists together. You'll always find one who's sufficiently over-opinionated to let the cat out of the bag.

In this case it's Professor Sir Michael Marmot of University College London, who advises the government on many health issues.

His sphere of influence includes the all-powerful WHO from whence he fights obesity and alcohol consumption with equally rabid gusto, having chaired the infamous World Cancer Research Fund study that says eating bacon gives you cancer.

A fact not so well publicized is that the same study claims to have found a direct link between alcohol intake and the likelihood of falling victim to cancer.

Sir Michael insists that the price of drink must be DOUBLED in real terms in order to stop young people and heavy drinkers consuming so much. This comes from the man who has Gordon Brown's ear, at a time when greedy Gordon is desperate for any scheme that will top up the coffers of his ailing client state.

Forget the 10% tax hike on booze seemingly under discussion.

That's just an illusion, a sleight of hand. Government targets will be set at 100% whether you like it or not. Statistics will appear suggesting most of the public support these measures and in budget stages it will be phased in over the next two years, with a generous pre-election announcement of a freeze at that level. Whoopie.

Add to that the potential 60% rise in beer prices forecast by industry experts and you are seriously looking at the £6 pint. How many of your regulars will remain so when you are forced to demand six squid a throw, for something similar to that they can get at the supermarkets for as little as 30p?

By that time the new rules will be coming in banning smokers from lighting up OUTSIDE your premises. The majority of pubs will face going out of business. Good. That's what they want.

Like post offices they anticipate pub closures on a wide scale. 50% less pubs would be a good start, anything above that a positive bonus.

Let it finally sink in - the trade as we know it has no future under these circumstances. It's war on pubs.