All ale 'n' hearty at brewers' xmas bash

Related tags Ale Beer

Thankfully no undercover policemen were lurking in the excellent Hand & Flower pub near Olympia, west London, last Thursday - they'd have had a...

Thankfully no undercover policemen were lurking in the excellent Hand & Flower pub near Olympia, west London, last Thursday - they'd have had a field day.

Only it wouldn't have been youngsters whose collars they felt.

This was the cream of British ale retailers celebrating the end of another challenging year and letting their hair down (those with hair anyway) as only they know how.

It was, of course, the regional brewers' Christmas luncheon - a very exclusive event with no managing directors or pubco reps but instead the hard-working deal-makers who flog their delicious wares all round the trade.

The only exception to this rule is that the guest speaker can be chosen from outside these hallowed ranks.

And as Marston's Beer Company was one of the lunch-sponsors (Thwaites was the other), its head of contract services Rod Grainger invited Marston's pubco boss Stephen Oliver to perform the honours.

An often controversial speaker (think Scots and pickled onions, think progresive beer duty), Oliver entertained the troops royally but without igniting fresh controversy this time.

As well as providing comradeship and good ale, the lunch also aims to raise

funds for worthy causes - and this year reached a record

£1,054, which went to the British Heart Foundation and Cancer Research.

That record was achieved thanks to an on-the-spot

fining system adminstered

by official fine-master

Stuart Bateman, whose expertise at pickpocketing would delight Fagin himself.

No one was spared, and some such as Roger Clayson and Fred West were dealt with particularly severely. But quite fairly, thought Snifter.

Guests were asked to bring presents for exchange with other guests, and some gifts were in dubious taste. Snifter will draw a veil of secrecy

over who offered an executive lap-dancing toy, or the handy little volume Sex Positions For Every Day of the Year.

Further details of the luncheon are now lost in the haze of a highly enjoyable afternoon.

Suffice to say that the

best traditions of the lunch were observed right to the end, with at least one member of the party getting on

the wrong train and calling for a lengthy lift home from Peterborough.

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