Hamish Champ: S&N and the price of fish. Sorry, beer

I'd love to be a fly on the wall when the management team from Scottish & Newcastle (S&N) finally sits down with the gang from Carlsberg and Heineken to talk about the latter's raised eight quid a share offer. That is, assuming they manage to clear up the latest dividend hiccup that is being reported in some quarters as a potential spanner in the works.

Given all that's been said by either side in the last few weeks on the subject of what S&N is worth and how much money its potential suitors want to pay for it one might reasonably expect the atmosphere at the get-together to be a tad… tense.

Now I know that squaring up to each other is part and parcel of what protagonists do in a takeover battle - just as in the US contenders for the presidential nomination claw rival candidates from their own party like cats in a bag, only to clap the successful individual on the back and fulsomely pledge eternal support when the winner is announced.

Professionalism will doubtless be the order of the day between the two partners of Baltic Beverage Holdings - the Eastern European venture that lies at the heart of Carlsberg's approach. After all, there's a lot of money at stake. That said, it's hard to envisage hearty handshakes all round. Indeed, Kofi Anann might make a good bet as mediator.

But putting rancour on one side, assuming it all goes through, what then? Who will run what in the UK? Will S&N lifer John Dunsmore, having put up such a good fight for his company, land a plum job in the New Scheme Of Things, or join an ambitious rival? And which of S&N's famous brands will survive and which won't? What will happen to S&N's Pub Enterprise's' estate?

And, since one reader last week asked why all the fuss about S&N when pubs in this country were being "screwed out of business", will a deal make much of a difference to UK boozers? Probably not, though I expect we'll see more Heineken taps springing up all over the place.

Meanwhile…

I see that as a result of rising barley and malt prices, etc, the British Beer & Pub Association is warning us all that a pint of beer could soon cost £4. £4?!? If you live in London there are places where you pay that already. Now a fiver​ a pint; then​ you'd be talking LOADSAMONEY!…