Chris Maclean: The food of love
Over the weekend I tried my hand at writing some kind of advertisement that would help retain some of my regular customers. There are some blank areas in the lobby to the toilets which could do with something interesting with and I fancied something humorous. The intention was to try and write something funny which people might connect to and help confirm in their minds that they are all part of what we are trying to do here. I wanted to write something in the style of a Mills and Boon novel with a twist and printed so that it looks like a page from a paperback. Maybe it will work, maybe it won't. Judge for yourself.
An extract from Lavinia's Fondant Peaks by Barbara Cartland
Manfully, Edward lifted her onto the table sweeping the empty dishes to the floor. Lavinia unbuttoned her blouse and looked defiantly back into his eyes, smiling in anticipation of what was to come.
Edward took a scoop of the chocolate fondant and smeared it gently over her naked heaving breast. Then he took the jug of cream and poured it over her smooth flat stomach. She gasped loudly. Removing his shirt he crouched over her like a predator. The cream trickled down her sides. Burying his face in her he licked her. Slowly and sensually at first, but more heatedly as her body responded. Lavinia knew it had to be right here right now and guided him onwards.
The other diners in The Dining Room at the Railway Hotel continued eating but it was clear some were uncomfortable about such a display.
