John Porter: Family matters
I always look forward to the annual publication of the Good Pub Guide, if only so I can enjoy a quiet bout of apoplexy as I read the summary press release kindly provided by the editors.
Having last year decided that pubs were charging far too much for a meal, this year the guide is taking the industry to task over the perennial problem of the behaviour of children in pubs.
Given that, over the years, it has been at the forefront of calls for pubs to adopt a more family-friendly approach, some in the trade may feel that it's a bit rich for the guide to now point out that this can be a double-edged sword.
At least the introduction admits "we confess that we can't see an easy solution".
A jolly helpful contribution to the debate, I'm sure we can all agree, even if this is hardly a new dilemma for pubs. More than a decade ago, legislation allowing local authorities to issue Children's Certificate caused the trade considerable angst.
Fortunately, the scheme foundered on the fact that most councils made the conditions for issuing a certficate so onerous that very few pubs bothered to apply.
Then, at the start of this decade, came proposals for licensing reform. In an early draft, it emerged that there would be an assumption that children were allowed into pubs unless the licence conditions specifically said otherwise. This was all part of the Government's perhaps naïve view that British society would segue seamlessly into the continental, café society model without a hiccup.
A number of licensees pointed out that the prospect of monosyllabic, behooded 14-year-olds exercising their legal right to pop into their local and recreate the lightsaber duelling scene from Star Wars with the pool cues could cause the trade a few headaches. Fortunately, the legislation was tidied up by the Lords.
Which brings us to the current situation. A few weeks ago I chaired a debate at the National Licensed Business Show, in which a number of publicans raised this issue. There is a certain irony in the fact that pub trade veterans who would have no qualms in inviting an unruly, 18 stone scaffolder to leave the premises will think twice about criticising the behaviour of a crayon-wielding five-year-old.
However, parents responding to real or implied criticism of their child are not always the most rational people. As a school governor in South London, I know that teachers routinely have to endure extreme verbal abuse, and occasionally even physical threats from parents, when trying to resolve similar issues.
From a customer perspective, it cuts both ways. I've sat trying to watch the match over a pint and had to endure children repeatedly running in front of the screen, unchecked by their parents.
Equally, I've taken my children out for a family Sunday lunch and listened to loud 'tuts' from the table next to me every time one of them speaks above a whisper. The problem with such a scenario is that both I and the grumpy old git on the next table will think twice about coming to the pub next time.
Parents using pubs need to clearly understand the rules of engagement. High profile signage pointing out that unruly behaviour by children is unacceptable is a good start. If there's an area of the pub better suited to families, a member of staff pointing this out on arrival is a big help.
During the week, a cut-off time for children under a certain age isn't unreasonable - if it's clear that no family meals are served after, say, 8pm, everyone knows where they stand.
It's impossible to keep everyone happy. But as with any form of business planning, having a strategy is always better than crisis management. Especially if the crisis in question is throwing his chicken nuggets at you.
