Pete Robinson: Beer Group to meet Govt Ministers - Whoop-ee-doo!

The hope is to appeal to their better nature and effect a U-turn on taxing alcohol, at a time when they are desperate to wring every extra penny of tax they can get out of us.

The simple question you must ask yourself is why should they?

What's in it for Nu-Labour? Where does Brown's Government gain?

Surely the answer must be clear for all to see. They'll demand concessions that will break you. In the unlikely event they do agree to chip a little off alcohol tax they'll take your nose as a deposit pending the shirt off your back.

Wholesale pub closures and the decimation of the trade haven't occurred due to failure of govt policy. It's happened because THAT IS Nu-Labour policy! And things are going better than they could ever have anticipated.

They've already got you precisely where they want you. Whatever they do, however draconian their measures may be, they know beyond doubt the trade will meekly accept them with barely a murmur.

There's no trade union or pressure group standing up for your rights. Hence they are unconcerned about your pain. Far from speaking with a single voice the UK Licenced Trade continues to tear itself apart from within, as it busily stokes it's own funeral pyre.

Let's take a closer look at this group of leading Labourites upon whom so many would stake so much:

First there's tambourine-bashing Health minister Dawn Primarolo, who claims that alcohol abuse costs the country £25billion a year. She's ordered Pubs and clubs to help stop binge drinking.

Or else. She wants new legislation outlawing happy hours and large measures unless publicans "clean up their act".

Ms Primarolo also insists the smoking ban is the most popular legislation ever to happen in pubs, with "over three-quarters of people in support". Just a shame those alleged throngs don't also support pubs.

Home office minister Alan Campbell, who admits he "can't remember" the last time he was in a pub. Last month called for all pubs to adopt Challenge-25. "We would absolutely hope the on-trade takes a responsible view on this." Or else.

Trade minister Angela Eagle, who's dirty fingerprints are all over the alcohol duty tax hikes. She dismisses pub closures as merely "shifting tastes and consumer preferences". It's your fault, not hers.

Then there's culture secretary Gerry Sutcliffe and Treasury minister John Healey. Now these two gentlemen have occasionally shown flashes of common sense. Alas in Nu-Labour circles such things are the shortest route to the back benches, so they tow the party line. The best they can offer is urging pubs to "diversify" and appeal for LA grants - don't hold your breath.

Finally there's the man of the hour himself, Beer Group chairman John Grogan MP. You'll find him wherever there's a free drink to be imbibed, in the name of fact-finding of course. He's done paid work for Enterprise Inns and takes free junkets from any commercial entity willing to pick up the tab. Strangely enough he doesn't appear to be a critic of the pubco model.

What do all of the above politicians have in common? They ALL voted for the Pub smoking ban (with the exception of Mr Healey who was absent) - even Grogan. So during these discussions the smoking ban, or any possible amendments, won't even be on the agenda. Except perhaps for a round of back-slapping over the ban's resounding 'success'.

In my opinion the trade, as we know it, has no future without an amendment to the smoking ban. Even if we can break the tie and achieve fair rents there's still no point in having fifty-odd thousand pubs when the majority are empty most nights. The inevitable result will be the extinction of the 'local', save for a few cloned pub-chain diners.

Please understand this government hates pubs. The last thing they want right now is the nouveau unemployed filling our pubs while chuntering in loud voices about never voting for this shower again.

They don't care about you or your plight, your aspirations, your dreams. That's because you run a politically-incorrect establishment. You sell alcohol and fatty food for profit and encourage anti-social behaviour. You've never specifically catered for minorities, sexual or ethnic, so your pub doesn't feature in Nu-Labour's brave new world. They'd prefer to see at least 50% of pubs gone for good. Anything beyond that would be a positive bonus.

Amazingly this government openly boasts it's new regulations will lead to more pub closures and job losses. Under the guise of improving health and fighting alcohol abuse Nu-Labour won't stop wounding the trade until they are hounded out of office. By then the damage will be permanent.

Are you going to let that happen? Looks like, as a trade, you are.

Share a table with the devil and you can be sure Hell is on the menu. Or even worse in the small print. These talks will produce nothing but empty promises and a shedload of pain.