Chris Maclean: The art of relationship management

Its been a long day. Much of it has been spent teaching new licensees, and others, a course on cellar management; the skills necessary to produce good beer. It's a job I love doing, but it comes at a price.

Everyone on the course knows that this aspect of their business is vital and that, unless they get all the necessary information from me, their business might fail. Its a heady privilege but the price is I am generally exhausted when I return.

When I return home in the early evening my wife is watching one, of any number of, cookery programme on television where celebrity chefs create culinary magic. "What's for dinner?" I ask.

Without her eyes leaving the television I get "Well you can have beans-on-toast, cheese-on-toast or mushrooms-on-toast". Its at this point I feel that the celebrity chefs have failed to connect. I suggest my sullen expression is simply because I am tired.

At the front line of many pubs exists a fragile relationship between husband and wife. The lovely Mrs Maclean and I have been married 30 years this month. This is an astonishing period. Yet I still refer to her as "the FIRST Mrs Maclean". We have covered a lot of ground, but for many new licensees this will prove to be a difficult time.

The role of "partnership" in running a pub is often ill-considered. I've seen too many models where the wife is locked into the kitchen whilst the husband plays mine-host. I've no wish to arouse the sensibilities of the feminist movement but there seems to be a natural gravitation towards some of the tasks in running a pub.

The cellar, for example, is clearly my responsibility. The roles are different, which is not to suggest some are more important than others. Tasks need doing. Sometimes one is better at achieving them than another. I would suggest it is the ease with which people settle into the roles necessary to maintain a good lifestyle AND an good delivery in the pub that ensure a pub is successful or not.

So the division of tasks and responsibilities is important and it shouldn't, necessarily, be determined by gender. But it is vitally important that pubs are operated with a consistency that, perhaps, is only possible if a team runs it.

Division of labour is "good". But equally importantly, a sense of tolerance is necessary. Sometimes you just need to bite your tongue. It can be the recipe for a longer lasting relationship.

So I went for the cheese-on-toast. Mighty fine it was too. I was starving, and still am. But I cannot help but think those celebrity chefs were getting a better dinner. I'm still hopeful some of it will get through.

So thirty years will be celebrated by us. We'll go back to the pub in Coniston we went to on our honeymoon. But I think I'll organise the eating.