Jokes!
Christmas may have been and gone, and January may stretch on into the forseeable future, but there's no need to mope! Our jokes should bring a smile to your face.
What do you mean they're not funny?
That's fighting talk - come on then - see if you can do better.
Add your own jokes on as comments at the bottom of this page.
Please bear in mind that any filthy jokes will be removed - so keep it (fairly) clean!
Adele TurnerWeb Editor, thePublican.com team
Two peanuts walked into a bar.
One was assaulted
As a drunk lurched down the road he saw a motorist looking under the bonnet of his car.
'Whash the matter?'
'Piston broke,' came the reply.
'Me too,' slurred the drunk staggering off.
A jump-lead walks into a bar.
The barman says, 'I'll serve you, but don't start anything'.
Two judges got drunk and were arrested for drunken behaviour and each agreed to try the other's case.
The first judge came into court and pleaded guilty. His friend fined him five pounds. Then it was his turn to judge his companion.
'I sentence you to thirty days in prison,' he said.
His friend was astonished and exclaimed, 'But I only fined you five pounds.'
'I know,' said the second judge. 'But there's too much of this sort of thing. This is the second case I've heard today'.
A preist, a rabbi and a vicar walk into a bar
The barman says, 'Is this some kind of joke?'
A woman walks into a bar and asks for a double entendre. So the bar man gave her one.